Relationshipism

Relationshipism, is a term I have invented and coined, meaning any attitude, theory, or ideology, which devalues or denies people relationships, their relationship experiences and/or potential, or any dogma or theory which devalues people because they are single, or which deems people or individuals as incapable of having relationships.

The American writer and critic of psychiatry, Peter Breggin, in his lecture The Myth of Schizophrenia and Genetics, says that some psychiatrists have a genetics theory about diagnosed mental illness, which says that because of the genetics of diagnosed schizophrenics, diagnosed schizophrenics are incapable of relating to others, finding partners, and reproducing. Peter Breggin says that these psychiatrists, pick on the most oppressed and socially isolated individuals, in order to back up their genetics theories, and that people are likely to be without partners, because of problems relating to how they have been treated by others, and that diagnosed schizophrenia is caused by the state of society and the environment.

There is a more political aspect to relationshipism, when and where society may measure relationship love and potential, purely or overall in terms of money, class, or social status. I’m not arguing that some competition - which is part of most relationships - is in itself overall relationshipist, although if a person was consistently cheated on by their partner, or had their partners taken away from them by the State, then I think it would be commonly be considered that this is a form of relationshipism.

There are many positive and negative aspects to being single, and some people who have been abused or very controlled in the past, may find some positive liberation in being single for a while, with the positive aspects of personal freedom and finding their true selves. On the other hand, single people, can also be without love, intimacy, and relationship companionship, finding themselves lonely and cut-off from others, or from who they really are individually and socially.

One other aspect of relationshipism, is to devalue single people or people with diagnosed mental health problems, as incapable of having relationships, in order to superiorise the relationships of other groups or classes in society as much better, and to deny or mystify the problems sometimes within all relationships.

At one time, black people were regarded as being incapable of having relationships, because they were very falsely labelled and considered by many white people, as being primitive and insensitive, and as being incapable of making moral decisions about their own relationships.

The repression and control, by the ruling or more wealthier and powerful classes, to dictate to and instruct poorer and less powerful people, on relationship matters and sexual morality, all happened during a time, when most relationships were in turmoil, because of the repression of female sexuality - related to the social and economic inequality between men and women - and when domestic violence and abuse was then legitimised by the rich and powerful.

No one should be devalued because they are single, nor because they may find it hard to find the right or suitable sexual-love partners, and are socially marginalised and discriminated against. If one group or class of people, are saying that they are superior to others, in terms of individual or relationship potential, then this is again relationshipism, and which like racism, classism, and sexism, puts one group or class of people over and above another, in order to deny and mystify the nature of all human love relationships.